Monday, July 2, 2012

In Which I Grace You With My Illustrious Presence

I'd better not tell you how late my sister and I stayed up on Saturday night.  Some of you would probably take it as a matter of course because you stay up that late every night-- others would probably be a little horrified.  (I will say that we went to sleep while it was still Saturday... but only just.  Ahem.)  Technically we were in bed and the lights were out but at the rate we were talking, we may as well have still been up.

Our late-night chats run a gamut of topics, from writing to movie costumes to Jane Austen to writing to getting married to writing to blogging to writing... and did I mention writing?  That, too.  Last night our conversation went something like this.

Anne-girl: And I still think you should do a blog tour.
Amy: Run that by me again.  I still don't understand what it's all about.
Anne-girl:  It's when you go around to a whole bunch of people's blogs to promote your book.  First you post on your blog that you're going to have a blog tour and then if people are interested in hosting you on their blog for an interview or a guest post about your book, they'll comment and say so.  And then either they send you questions about your book for an interview, or they ask you to write a guest post about something writing-related.   And you write up a blurb about yourself and little bit about your book and put it on all the blog tour posts.  Oh, and you have to have a picture, too, but you can use one of Elinor Dashwood so no one will know that you actually have two heads.  {I made up something in that sentence.  Just to see if you were paying attention.}
Amy: That sounds like fun, but I still think it sounds... I don't know... kind of stuck-up to just post on my blog, "Hey, everybody, invite me to be on your blog so I can talk about myself!"  It sounds like showing off.
Anne-girl: Then write it that way.
Amy: Huh?
Anne-girl:  Write a post saying that you've decided to grace the populace with your illustrious presence and have deigned to take a blog tour, and if any of the masses wish to host your royal self on their blogs, they can leave a comment or e-mail you and your secretary will contact them as soon as possible.  And then it will be funny, and you won't have to worry about sounding stuck-up.  Because you WILL sound stuck-up, but everybody will know it was just a joke.  Except that you really do want to do the blog tour.  Make sure people know that part is serious, anyway.
Amy: You're brilliant.

So.  Lay-deez and other lay-deez, Her Royal Highness, Miss Amy Dashwood, has graciously consented to participate in a blog tour in order to promote the work of great literature that she has recently completed.  She was, of course, far too modest to even consider such a thing at first, but her courtiers managed to convince her that it would be an excellent way to acquaint the masses with the story she has written (in other words, free advertising!).  Any peasant who wishes to host Miss Dashwood on her blog may submit a request in triplicate to missdashwood95[at]gmail[dot]com, where it will be put under consideration by Miss Dashwood's personal secretary, Miss Deirdre McSnoot.  If Miss McSnoot decides to grant the peasant's humble request for an interview, she will set up communication between the peasant and Miss Dashwood to discuss when, where and what (that is, the date of the interview/guest post, the blog on which it is to appear, and what the content of the post should be).   It is, of course, understood that any peasant counted worthy of hosting Miss Dashwood during Miss Dashwood's blog tour will be sensible of the great honor conferred upon her and will act accordingly.  One curtsy, however, will be sufficient.  You needn't strain your back.

Miss McSnoot eagerly awaits your requests, as she has very little to do around the office right now except link paper clips together, and she gets rather bored with that.

10 comments:

Melody said...

Okay. I think that was the most ridiculous screech of laughter I have ever done when reading something you said. And it happened when I came to Miss Deirdre McSnoot.

Heh, heh, heh. *does the private joke dance*

Um, anyways. You did not tell me about this. *glares* You had ample opportunity, you know. *cough* But I guess if you told me everything I wouldn't have any surprises left.

Anyways, I think this is a swellissimus idea, and the conversation with your sister was HILARIOUS, and this whole thing is hilarious, and I think it's a good idea, too. I'm glad your sister put you up to it.
But y'know, you should have REALLY got a secretary to set up the interviews for you--ME. >:D
Ah well.

Hope you do get lots of responses. We certainly can't have Miss McSnoot being bored. *snorts*

Anne-girl said...

Miss McSnoot better let me have an interview. After all it was MYidea!

Maria Elisabeth said...

I would like to be graced with your illustrious presence. Miss McSnoot may expect an email from me shortly.

I remain, madam, with very great pleasure at being so condescended to, your most humble servant...

*Mr.Collins bow*

~Maria Elisabeth

Although you probably knew that already, but I don't like ending comments with a Mr. Collins bow.

An Old-Fashioned Girl said...

*clears throat*
Miss Dashwood,
It would give me the greatest pleasure to host your royal highness, and to that end, I shall send an email to Miss McSnoot with all possible speed!

Anonymous said...

Such a marvelous idea, Miss Dashwood!

I'm exceedingly diverted that you gave me your secretary's email address so that I may write her with a MOST humble request that your presence be known on my humble abode. (I'd faint before writing you, m'dear.... Your grace's status is so much higher than mine own....)

Please notify your dear Miss Deirdre McSnoot that she will very likely get an email from me within the next five minutes.

Sincerely,
The Peasant Who Grovels at Your Illustrious and Authorly Feet, Eowyn.

Rhoswen Faerie Wrose said...

If Miss McSnoot would condescend to allow your royal presence on such an umble blog as my own, (...wait a minute...Uriah! Get away from my computer!)
There... now.
I really would absolutely love to host you! Expect an email from me! :-)

Elizabeth Rose said...

Oh, what a splendid idea! I know J. Grace Pennington did something similar to promote her book. If Miss McSnoot would deign to acknowledge my humble epistle, 'twould be my delight to host Her Royal Highness on Literary Lane. Just give me a day or two to dust my mantlepiece, mop my floors, and fluff my pillows once or twice. I would hate to be caught unawares, you understand, when such a fine and elegant lady is involved.

Respectfully,
Elizabeth Rose

Alexandra said...

I have sent off an email to Miss McSnoot forthwith and right verily.

Sheeeeesh, this is going to be so fun!!!

Miss Melody Muffin said...

I laughed so hard while I was reading this!!!!

That said, Miss Deidre McSnoot shall hopefully receive an email from me sometime tomorrow, as my brain is far too exhausted tonight to make the request from this humble peasant properly!

And, tomorrow I will also begin to brush up on my curtsy!

Just for curiosity's sake, what is Miss McSnoot's record for how many paper clips she can string together in one sitting? :)

Kiri Liz said...

I apologize, m'dears, for me tardiness, but the weekend has kept me far from the electronic world of blogging and so I haven't had time to comment before now. I would love the illustrious presence of Her Royal Highness, Miss Dashwood, to appear on my blog, and I will do my best to send an email to Miss McSnoot forthwith. :)